Transformers’ Brain Trust Can’t Handle Divergent Opinions On Moderately Accessible Female Musician

BOOM!

I was reading Pitchfork’s review of the new Feist album in order to formulate an original opinion. Then a link caught my eye.

This is (by far) the best nugget I’ve taken from the site.

Shia LaBeouf learned how to play with others on action-movie sets, which may help explain why he’s often ready for a fight. One scrape last October during the filming of “Transformers: Dark of the Moon” at Florida’s Kennedy Space Center pitted the young actor against director Michael Bay over a song.

With military and NASA personnel watching, Bay and his leading man were shooting an emotional sequence from the script’s third act on a shuttle launchpad at Cape Canaveral. To put himself in a somber frame of mind, LaBeouf plugged his iPod into some speakers and started playing a wistful ballad, Feist’s “Brandy Alexander.”

“Yeah, it’s a little feminine, but it touches me,” LaBeouf says, starting to pepper his recollection with more expletives than are allowed in the PG-13 film. “I feel something when I hear it. … But Mike doesn’t want to listen to ‘Brandy Alexander’ under the rocket with 50 military dudes around.”

Bay unplugged the actor’s iPod, LaBeouf says, and replaced it with his own, cueing up the propulsive, orchestral “The Dark Knight” score. “I take him aside, I’m like, ‘Mike, this is the most important moment in the movie for me. The crux of my whole character, my whole arc. That doesn’t work for me, dude.’ … Now it’s two dudes ready to kill each other. … Spit’s flying.” According to LaBeouf, Bay left the set with the NASA/military entourage, and his director of photography finished shooting the sequence without him. (Bay declined to be interviewed for this piece.)

After much deliberation, 2 armored truck explosions, and a Red Bull/vodka-induced LaBeouf temper tantrum, the 2 douchebags settled on that Aerosmith song from Armageddon.

After working on three “Transformers” movies together, the 25-year-old actor says, Bay is “sort of my big brother. …We’re both very game, very passionate people. Sometimes it’s not actor-director. Sometimes it’s two dudes yelling over explosions. Sometimes it doesn’t sound like the friendliest conversation. But we love each other.”

The greatest love story Bay has produced.

As for Feist, the new album is pretty good. Graveyard is a beautiful song. I’d give it about a 7.8. Nahhh, 7.7.

2009 One Last Time

You probably can’t wait to put the last godforsaken decade behind us.  I agree 100%.  However, before this happens, let’s give 2009 one more “courtesy flush.”

The one 2009 movie you should see: Food, Inc.

Movie franchise abomination that needs to be left in the godforsaken 2000’s: Transformers.

Most underappreciated television show: Breaking Bad.

Best trio of old-timey character actors on television: Harry Dean Stanton,

bad ass

Grace Zabriskie, Mary Kay Place, Big Love.

Best television channel I discovered: NFL’s Comcast RedZone.

Most disappointing television show: Bored to Death.  Schwartzman, Galifianakis and Danson? Should be amuzing. Snoozer.

Best Non-Fiction Book few people read: The Dead Hand, David Hoffman.

Local Food of the Year: The Brussel Sprout.

Worst Trend in Hair:  The black man-faux-hawk. First the Eurotrash. Then the gays. Now the African-Americans. Arabs, be careful. 

Best sports’ personnel moves I begrudgingly acknowledge:  Yankees throw huge $ at C.C., Burnett and Tex.  Paid off big time.

Favorite sports success: Young Blackhawks make run to Conference Finals. Look prime for years to come. 

Favorite sports failure:  Charlie Weis.

Finally…Quotes of 2009!!!

“I wouldn’t go anywhere in confined places now. … When one person sneezes it goes all the way through the aircraft. That’s me. I would not be, at this point, if they had another way of transportation, suggesting they ride the subway.” —Vice President Joe Biden, dispensing handy tips to protect against the swine flu and freaking us out, “Today Show” interview, April 30, 2009

“I have only two passions: space exploration and hip-hop.” — Astronaut Buzz Aldrin, 79, who is producing a single with rapper Snoop Dogg.

“You give me a water board, Dick Cheney and one hour, and I’ll have him confess to the Sharon Tate murders.” Jesse Ventura, during a CNN interview May 11.

“It’s almost like kicking a dead horse in the ground” –Terrell Owens.

“Exercise freaks … are the ones putting stress on the health care system.” —Rush Limbaugh, June 12, 2009

“Yo Taylor, I’m really happy for you… Imma let you finish. But Beyoncé had one of the best videos of all time! One of the best videos of all time!” Kanye West, being an asshole.

“Iranian twitter activity similar to what we did in House last year when Republicans were shut down in the House.” —a Twitter post by Rep. Pete Hoekstra (R-MI), comparing the mass uprising of Iranians — utilizing Twitter as an organizing tool — to the GOP’s attempt to express dissatisfaction over Nancy Pelosi’s decision to adjourn Congress before an energy vote last year.

“What’s up London?” — Britney Spears addressing audience at her show in Manchester.

“We were aware the animal was unpredictable and it is being treated with pills for depression.” — Bernadette Chirac, wife of former French president Jacques Chirac who was mauled by his pet poodle Sumo.

“People such as scientist Stephen Hawking wouldn’t have a chance in the U.K., where the National Health Service would say the life of this brilliant man, because of his physical handicaps, is essentially worthless.” —a July 31 editorial in Investor’s Business Daily warning about end-of-life counseling in health care reform. Hawking, in fact, lives in England and has been treated by their National Health Service, which, by his own account, saved his life

“And of course, here you go. I still love her, but she’s retarded too.” Guy Ritchie on ex-wife Madonna to Esquire magazine.

“UPS and FedEx are doing just fine, right? It’s the Post Office that’s always having problems.” – President Obama, attempting to make the case for government-run healthcare, while simultaneously undercutting his own argument,

“I find it interesting that it was back in the 1970s that the swine flu broke out under another, then under another Democrat president, Jimmy Carter. I’m not blaming this on President Obama, I just think it’s an interesting coincidence.” —Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN), on the 1976 Swine Flu outbreak that happened when Gerald Ford was president, April 28, 2009

During some playful banter between legendary New York broadcaster Ernie Anastos and weatherman Nick Gregory on FOX 8, the following exchange occurred:
Anastos: “It takes a tough man to make a tender forecast.”
Gregory, looking confused: “I guess that’s me.”
Anastos: “Keep fucking that chicken.”
Co-anchor Dari Alexander: [eyes bug out of head] (Watch video)

“This president I think has exposed himself over and over again as a guy who has a deep-seated hatred for white people or the white culture….I’m not saying he doesn’t like white people, I’m saying he has a problem. This guy is, I believe, a racist.” —Glenn Beck, on Obama, July 28, 2009

“The coach asked me if I knew how to get into a 3-point stance. I said, no, but I know how to steal a Buick Regal.” – Darnell Dockett, Cardinals defensive tackle, describing his troubled youth, Jan. 28.

“It may be tempting and more comfortable to just keep your head down, plod along, and appease those who demand: ‘Sit down and shut up,’ but that’s the worthless, easy path; that’s a quitter’s way out.” —Sarah Palin, quitting her job as governor, July 3, 2009

and my favorite quote of the year…

“Shout out to President Obama. How you doooooin? Oh, and shout out to all the people with athlete’s foot out there! I feel you!” –Wendy Williams, The Wendy Williams Show (via The AV Club)